How to Talk to Your Child About Divorce

Telling your child about a divorce or separation is a seriously dreaded topic and one that parents hope they never have to approach. In reality, about 40 to 50% of marriages in the United States end in divorce, and many of these couples have children. While divorce or separation may be traumatic for the partners involved, it is important to consider how it will also affect your child.

Any parent wants what is best for their child and to prevent any pain or suffering, but the truth is that some degree of emotional pain or suffering is inevitable during a divorce. If you are considering a divorce, you do not have to go through this difficult time alone. Family law attorney services are available to assist you and your family through this turbulent time and help you communicate with your kids about divorce.

Having A Plan

The key is taking the necessary steps to have your divorce or separation go over as smoothly and painlessly as possible. How you communicate your divorce to your child will be engraved into their memory forever, so it is best to plan thoroughly.

First, discuss with your partner when, where, and the manner in which you will discuss your divorce with your child. Talking to your child together will demonstrate that you are united in your love and care for them. It is important to have adequate time for this discussion and not have to rush off to school or an appointment afterward. Take as much time as you need and offer as many reassurances as necessary. If possible, talk with your children 2-3 weeks before the actual separation.

Offering Reassurance

When discussing the subject of divorce, it is important to reassure your child. Let them know that this is a decision that you and your spouse have come to mutually, and believe is for the best. It is important to avoid placing blame. Reassure your child that the divorce has nothing to do with anything they did and you both love them.

You can also let them know that, while the living situation may change, you will remain a happy, loving family. Have a plan regarding custody, parenting, or the living situation so you can answer any potential questions. You may want to consider speaking with a child custody lawyer or family law attorney services beforehand.

Generally, one conversation is not enough to alleviate all your child’s concerns. This will require monitoring them daily and checking in to see how they are feeling. To help your children adjust during this period, research has shown that three factors will help this process go as smoothly as possible:

1. Maintaining a strong relationship with both parents
2. Present parenting
3. Minimal exposure to conflict

An experienced family law attorney or divorce lawyer can counsel their clients throughout this process. Family law attorney services are a crucial part of ensuring the best possible outcome for all parties involved.